Does your partner snore? If you share a bed with someone who regularly snores when sleeping, it can be very disruptive.
In this blog, Dr Lindsay Browning offers advice on how to cope and what you can do to help the snorer in your life.
Why are they snoring?
When you sleep next to someone who snores, the first step is to see if you can find out why they are snoring and stop it. For example:
- is the snoring is allergy or hayfever related?
- is it because they are overweight?
- could it be related to their sleeping position?
- is it due to sleep apnoea?
If you can discover the reason, then sometimes it can be much easier to stop or reduce the snoring by actively changing something.
If the snoring is caused by allergies, you could try sleeping with hypoallergenic pillows, instead of feather pillows, and keep pets out of the bedroom all together. During the summer, don’t dry bedding outdoors, as allergens like pollen, can get into the bedding leading to potential hayfever related snoring, at night.
Reducing alcohol consumption and losing some weight can reduce or even prevent snoring all together too. Perhaps discuss with your partner if this something they could consider.
Position can also be changed. Often snoring is worse when someone sleeps on their back. In which case, if your partner can sleep on their side instead, it can help to reduce snoring.
If you want to stop someone rolling onto their back in the night, sew a tennis ball into the back of an old T-shirt for them to wear in bed. If they roll over in their sleep onto their back (making snoring more likely), they will naturally roll over again because of the tennis ball. It’s a great cheap hack.
If the snoring is broken by pauses in breathing during the night, then this is indicative of obstructive sleep apnoea. Sleep apnoea is where your throat closes up during the night so much that the airway is completely blocked and air cannot flow at all. After a while of not breathing, your brain will realise and send a surge of adrenaline to wake you up in order for you to breathe again, then you will likely fall straight back to sleep. Often, people will fall back to sleep again so quickly that they will not realise they woke up at all, but their sleep quality will have been damaged by this disruption. In sleep apnoea these awakenings can happen repeatedly through the night causing you to have significantly disrupted sleep. Other signs of sleep apnoea are that you may wake with a choking sensation or may feel chronically tired during the daytime, despite the fact that you thought you got sufficient sleep at night.
If you notice the pauses in breathing or speak to your snoring partner about these symptoms and suspect they may have sleep apnoea, then it is very important to encourage them to speak to a GP. There are significant health implications to untreated sleep apnoea.
Do anti-snore pillows really work?
If the snoring is positional, then anti-snore pillows may help to guide the sleeper into a sleeping position that’s more likely to keep the airway open and reduce snoring. There are a few different kinds.
Firstly, a wedge pillow is a firm pillow shaped like a triangle designed to try to keep the upper body elevated during sleep. This can help with some positional snoring by encouraging the head, neck and upper body to remain at an angle to minimise a narrowing of the airway. This is particularly useful for back sleepers to keep the upper body slightly elevated. However, due to the high angle of these pillows, some sleepers can find themselves gradually moving down the pillow in their sleep, and making the sleeping position less effective because they don’t stay in that elevated position. Other anti-snore pillows use shaped foam to keep the head in a particular position during the night, helping to encourage side sleeping and a less obstructed airway.
It is important to note that not all snoring is positional and, therefore, for some people it doesn’t matter what position they sleep in, they will continue to snore.
Is it true they can’t hear their own snoring?
Often, someone will not know that they snore because they will be asleep while it’s happening. They only know when you tell them…or elbow them in the side!
The only other signs your partner may have is that they wake up with a dry throat, a headache, or still feeling tied even when they should have had enough sleep. This is because they may not be getting the good quality sleep they need as sleep quality has been disturbed by snoring, even if they can’t hear it.
How can I sleep better when my bed partner is snoring?
If you struggle to fall asleep because your partner is snoring, you may like to use a white noise machine or brown noise sounds, if you prefer, to help mask the sound of the snoring.
Learn more here:
You can also consider these options to help reduce the disruption from someone’s snoring:
- Ear plugs (for you to wear) – they will help to block the sound so that your partner’s snoring won’t affect your sleep as much.
- Move to another room – during the night, if you are feeling frustrated and unable to go back to sleep due to the snoring, it may be a good idea to go to another room, if that is feasible.
- Read a book or have a chamomile tea – take a break from the frustrating situation, calming yourself down and moving away, before coming back to bed and trying to get back to sleep can be helpful.
- Go to bed before your partner – you might be able to fall asleep before they come to bed – the hope being that you will not wake up to their snoring if you are already asleep.
- Separate bedrooms – this is the most effective solution – but perhaps seen as the last resort! Although many couples feel that they have “failed” if they sleep in separate bedrooms, the reality is that most people sleep much better when they have their own bedrooms. This way your partner’s snoring will not affect your sleep.
Can sleeping next to a partner who snores affect my health?
If you are struggling to fall asleep or get back to sleep because your partner is snoring then this may lead to you not getting enough sleep.
Not getting enough sleep can affect your mental and physical health as well as your immune system and ability to concentrate during the day. Even if you are able to fall asleep or get back to sleep when someone is snoring, your sleep quality may be affected due to the noise disturbing you during the night, without you even realising.
It is a good idea to stop the snoring itself, because that will help both you and your partner’s sleep.
Snoring and sleep
There are many reasons why people snore and, as discussed above, understanding the reasons why can be a good step forward in identifying ways to help a partner to reduce or stop snoring.
Learn more about why people snore and its causes, in my FAQ blog:
And do remember to seek professional advice if you are concerned about your partner’s snoring, potential sleep apnoea or the effect on your own sleep.